Jess wanted to make this video. I always ask her first. It helps her to process the information we have discussed when she listens back. This is not of the happy, joyful, Jess that you know and love. She is anxious and agitated in this video. I am sharing this video for educational purposes. I think it could help others better understand expressive communication disorder to see Jess try to tell me why she doesn’t want a haircut. This is an 8 minute video.
Jess hates haircuts. She always has. For many years I cut her hair myself, however I have been trying to wean her off of me and onto a hairstylist. If I knew exactly what it was that was the problem, then it could potentially help me help her work through it.
Jess has an expressive communication disorder and cannot verbalize why it bothers her so much to get her haircut. In this video, I try to talk her through it to see if we can pinpoint what it is. I think it is a fear of getting cut. She has never been cut with scissors.
The other things Jess says in this video, like worrying about the stylist touching her sore spot, is not what’s really the root of the problem. It’s just something she is able to verbalize.
Days like this are difficult for both of us in completely different ways. It stresses me to see Jess so anxious and unhappy. I feel helpless to make the situation better for her. It is also difficult because while I am devoting my energy to help her, I sacrifice all productivity. My goal of the day is to try to help her stay calm, or at least minimize anxiety, and prevent self-harm. On these days, I lose a whole day of work.
After the haircut is over, Jess is exhausted. Even after she is relieved that it’s behind her and she is happier, she’s still upset and randomly interjects a whine noise that I know to mean something’s bothering her. She feels lots of regret when she loses her cool.
Hopefully, this is the last cut for a while. I think I’m ready to let it grow out again just so that it’s simple to cut. This curl business is cute but troublesome.